BIG DREAMS

It seems that society, or more specifically, Singapore society, expects us to have big dreams, if not big nationalistic dreams. Since we were children, we are taught by people around us to contribute to society, or even to humanity. We are told to be doctors to alleviate the human condition from malaise, to be lawyers and law enforcers to rid society of injustice, to be philanthropists and social workers to bring about equity in the world, and so on. Our role models are and remain to be Gandhi, Mother Theresa, Abraham Lincoln, and Lee Kuan Yew (just look up any Singapore social studies textbook, and if you beg to differ, you’re one of my friends). In short, we were raised to have big dreams and do big things. We are expected to make a difference.

What if one simply doesn’t care? Then he becomes a pariah, condemned to be a selfish scum of the earth.

I don’t have big dreams. And I think I never had them. I don’t care about homeless people living on the streets, simply because I am not one of them. But if, I, for some unexplainable reason, join the ranks of the homeless, I would definitely fight the hell out of me for my rights. In short, I am apathetic to those that do not concern me. I don’t need to concern myself with ailing Africans or countries engaged in gruesome civil war unless, A, I’m part of a pharmaceutical company, or B, I’m a gun runner selling arms to both sides of the war. Do not misunderstand me. I am not the devil, nor do I have evil intentions. I am merely apathetic to distant suffering. And if unfortunate things had already happened to my fellow inhabitants of this earth, I don’t see anything wrong in benefitting from their misfortunes, if and only if I am not at liberty to help them anyway. If you can’t help them, might as well siphon off them. Right?

Alright, I digressed quite a bit. I’m supposed to write about my dream. My dream is small and simple. It involves only a penthouse apartment in Dubai, 12 barely clothed supermodels, poker, a few like minded friends, martinis, and merry. Despite its miniscule size, I think I need a considerable amount of planning and funding to achieve this dream. But it is okay. It is attainable, when compared to dreams like making every one in the world a saint, or like stopping people from ever engaging in warfare, or like bringing equality to society. In fact, I already have plans to make it happen. And I need YOU, my friends, to help me achieve it. Under mentioned are my plans. Feel free to sign up for any one of them. But please take note, due to the limited number of supermodels in my dream, only 11 other straight male friends can sign up. This restriction does not apply to my homosexual male friends and all female friends.

Plan 1: Drug Dealing.
Basically, we buy a plot of poppies in Afgan from the Taliban, process the produce and sell them at a marked up price in the G7 countries.
Pros: The Taliban is friendly to all who wants to screw with Western civilization
Cons: The penalty for drug dealing in most G7 countries is a life sentence.

Plan 2: Gun Running
We hook up with the Chinese, and the Russians and ship these arms to Africa where the sonnobitches love killing themselves over cattle and land and water.
Pros: Watching people kill each other with our merchandise is hugely entertaining, not to mention great for business for our counterparts in the entertainment – oops I mean mass media – industry.
Cons: The Chinese and Russians have tighter controls over their AKs these days.

Plan 3: Ponzi Scam
Set up a phony fund and let the money roll in.
Pros: OMG! I can’t believe people still fall for this crap!
Cons: 150 years in prison

Plan 4: Sunny Island Wellness
Set up a practice with a plastic surgeon, a dental surgeon, a psychiatrist, a pediatrician and a general physician in town as a one-stop medical service for the rich and privileged. And charge them exorbitant prices of course.
Pros: All you people are going to be doctors any way.
Cons: The government likes to regulate healthcare services.

Plan 5: Rob a bank.
(Read the title)
Pros: Too fast too furious.
Cons: It’s Singapore, there’s no where to run.

To sign up, tag on my tag board, drop me a message on msn or simply holla me on fb. Your support is greatly appreciated.